I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize
