Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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