I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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