if you like me you must not know who I am
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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