i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
the raccoons are back...
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