I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
