Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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