I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
