Well douche your snatch and let's go!
You work out of a Hotel?
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
