If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize
