conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
