Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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