you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize