dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
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