I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
