He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
