Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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