im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
im holly from the hills drunk
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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