she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
We got so high we made milksteak
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
