hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
