is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize
