I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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