please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
He had one of those small greek statue penises
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
