Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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