scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
i out mim tonsoeep
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize
