That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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