Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Can I color on your dick again?
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Randomize
