Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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