so explain again why im purple
no
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
