Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
