He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
