You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I'm both gender and math confused
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
