did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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