hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
