They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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