When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
