I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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