Quick, to the slutcave!
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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