you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
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