you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
