hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize