But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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