Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Send help, water and tortillas.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize
