All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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