Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Less talking, more tequila
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
