yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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