Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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