He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
