Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
