why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
