New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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