yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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